911...can you please hold?

If you follow me on Insta,

you will know that I had a little excitement at my house last week.

I was just getting ready to leave for work

and our carbon monoxide detector went off.

The alarm.

Not the "change the battery" chirp...the full on "I am deaf for three hours following" alarm.

And the light was blinking....

the light next to the "seek fresh air" notice.

Fabulous.

I opened the windows in my bedroom and went out to my car.

I call my sweet husband.....who is out of town in meetings

(lol...he lives out of town during the week, so he was out of HIS town)

and he does not answer texts or phone calls.

Plan B.

Call Michigan dad.

Michigan mom answers and advises to call our heating company...

and STAY OUT OF THE HOUSE.

I call our un-friendly heating company customer service to talk to someone.

They are busy.

They will call me back.

An hour later and no call back,
so I am driving to Walmart to buy four gallons of milk and three loaves of bread.

(The joys of twin teen boys)

Finally my un-friendly heating company calls back.

"Well it's probably not something I can help you with with right away."

OK nevermind while I just die at home.

He suggests I call the fire department because they have a detector that can sense where it's coming from.

So I hang up and pay for my bread and milk,

and am NOT looking forward to calling the fire department.

I head to my car and lo and behold there is a fire truck parked at Walmart...

as in "let's stop by and pick up a few things" parked...

not there on an emergency.

I chuckled to myself thinking wouldn't it be funny if THOSE were the guys who came to my house?

I get home, load my milk into the fridge and make the call.

911

It rings twice...and then I kid you not, here is what I heard:

IF THIS IS NOT AN EMERGENCY, 

PLEASE HOLD AND SOMEONE WILL HELP YOU SHORTLY.

Seriously.

Ahhhh....If I WAS having an emergency like my house was burning down or I was having a heart attack,

WHO an I supposed to call INSTEAD of 911 if I can't "hold?"

I held.....and someone came on the line in two minutes.

I told her my "non-emergency" emergency and she said the fire department was on the way,
and that ALL calls were treated as "emergencies."
OK
I decided since I was on a recorded line, I would not be sassy
and ask who I was supposed to call if I was not able to "hold" because I was having an emergency?

So.....

I waited.

And waited.

And waited some more.

And decided that if my house WAS on fire, 

it most certainly would have burned to the ground by now.
But this was not an emergency...even though ALL calls are treated as "emergencies."

Finally I see the fire truck....it pulls up...

AND IT'S THE TRUCK I SAW AT WALMART.

The firefighters walked up to me and I asked

"Were you just at Walmart?"

They were a bit taken aback, but said "yes" and that they were getting lunch.

Great.....I'm glad you could grab lunch while my house is full of poisonous gas...I thought to myself.
Well I guess everyone is entitled to a lunch hour.

I imagine myself with a dying patient.....
"Hold.....I need to grab lunch....then you can die when I get back"
Can you tell I was feeling a bit frustrated by this point?
In-between all of this nonsense,
I was answering calls from patients and working on a nursing home placement.
I really did not have time for all of this...
it was a hurry up and "wait" kind of morning.

Well........
After all of that nonsense,

it turns out our detector was faulty.

Apparently this is rare, but not unheard of.

The firemen really were very friendly and patient,
and they assured me that it was safe to be inside my home.
Phew!

I felt like it was a totally wasted morning...
fortunately, I can laugh about it now!

Note to self....if I am having a TRUE emergency, prepare to "hold."